Confessions of A Writerholic: 07/01/2004

Thursday, July 29, 2004

Writing is a bit like sculpting or painting.

Whenever I would whip out my paints and paintbrushes, or a block or marble and chisle, or clay, I would have a clear picture in my mind of what I wanted my masterpiece to look like.

Of course, the first efforts aren't exactly masterpieces. And so, I would have to work, and rework, shape and reshape, paint and repaint my materials over and over again--sometimes up to six or seven times until I was able to step back, squint my eyes and see that it turned out as close as it could possibly be to what the picture in my mind was. There were also a few surprises to be seen: the hair color of the subject had changed with each brush stroke, or the placement of the subject's arm had changed with each chip, or the curve of the pot had narrowed or widened, or whatever came in between what my mind saw, and what my fingers did.

I always keep that in the forefront whenever I start and finish my first drafts. Sometimes draft anxiety creeps upon me, or even draft arrogance(you know, when that first draft turns out alright--to you--but your frickin critique partner's tell you otherwise), and I have to remind myself of the process my artwork took. It's a layering process. Everything's not going to come out spectacular the first time around, but that doesn't mean it'll suck either.

Anyways! Have I got a Book for YOU!
Leslie LaFoy's latest had been hovering through the edges of my mind for the longest time, and when I saw it in Wal-Mart, I just had to snap it up. And I was not disappointed. The Perfect Temptation, was just the sort of historical romance to pull me out of the reading slump Sookie Stackhouse had put me in. It seems that I sort of burnt myself out on historical romances because they weren't inspiring enough, or deviating from the norm. Not to say that I haven't read some jewels this year(Eloisa James, Karen Ranney, Julianne MacLean,Laura Lee Guhrke,etc), but after reading those gems, my mind hadn't been stimulated.

This book stimulated. And I'm not even talking about hot sex, or burning sexual tension. I'm talking about a book that made me sit up and pay close attention to every word that flew out of the character's mouths, every action they made, every exposition they made; and it was wonderful. I am completely awed over the skills La Foy used to lure me into this book and make me forget about the time of day.

Aidan and Alex's relationship unfurls completely different from most relationships in historical romance. Yes, they find each other attractive, and Yes, Aidan would like to bed her, but that, nor their personal experiences/internal conflicts, govern their every move, and every thought. At first, I was a bit leery because I had no idea what made the characters tic within the first 100 pages, but as I began to probe the dialogue and actions, I began to form a clearer and clearer picture of all the characters in the book.

Watching Aidan and Alex fall in love was similar to watching a really, really good romance movie: they talked, they enjoyed each other's company, they battled, and they genuinely cared about each other. I haven't seen a relationship so complex, yet so simple in a very, very long time. The pacing of the book is slower than I'm used to, but it fits with the plot and the characters very nicely. I am now on pins and needles, awaiting for her next release, The Perfect Desire, in January, as well as wanting to glom her backlist.

Wednesday, July 28, 2004

As you can probably see, it's official. My pen name has changed.

What makes it even more permanant(a bit), is the fact that I put up my temporary website(I don't feel in the mood to put myself in early debt just to have a domain and expensive webdesign. A simply designed site, hosted on a free webserver, with the basics of information is just fine for the moment), and it just feels....right. I can't describe it, but seeing my new pen name on the site seems very real in some odd, spacey sort of way; as if it's meant to be.

But anyways, here's the link: click it.

ALSO, my Brava entry is on there. I took the plunge and revised the excerpt my CP loved so much and submitted it to the contest. Who knows what will happen with it, but finally, finally, I like it. So go read it and tell me what you think.

I love Liz Carlyle.

I just finished read No True Gentleman, and my esteem of her writing capabilities is rising with each book. I just read it, and am utterly captivated by how well she is able to evoke the mood and atmosphere of her novels. And the funny thing is, is that these books are set in Regency England. Romances this sensual, atmospheric and lush aren't usually set in the Regency period, which makes Liz's books stand out even more. I want my books to read like that: lyrical, seductive,atmospheric,etc.

Now I have to make an appointment with my bank account and hopefully go on a backlist buying spree at my local UBS. And her book titles. I adore her book titles. I don't know whether she picks them or not, but whomever has chosen them is awesome.

I just went to her website again, and LOL, her heroine of her upcoming book is named Sidonie--how's that for a coincidence? And apparently, she is going to be in an Avon anthology coming out in January--double the fun because Eloisa James is going to be in it.

I know that Avon is famous for purportedly publishing the same stuff over and over again, but I am jealous! A reason why I would love to write for them is because they have a strong backbone in historicals, and they have lots of anthologies that are opportunities to get unknown names out there(ie; Lady W & Mia Ryan). I don't see the other publishing houses doing that. Plus, the fact that most of the popular historical romance authors write for Avon. The only thing I have against them, is that because they have so many historical romance authors, a new author may get swept under the rug unless buzz has generated for their releases. Yes, it's true of other houses as well, but for one as big as Avon, it's the kiss of death.

I just realized that I didn't like my pen name.

It is relevant to me and all--my mother's side of the family being Irish, my youngest cousin's name is Alexander--but then I realized that if I use it, it will be how I shall be addressed for the rest of my writing career. And it's odd, because everytime someone addresses me by it, it's jarring to my ear(or eyes).

And so, I am in the process of changing it. First, I went through a baby name book and wrote down all of the girl's names I liked, picked the top 12, then went through the boys section and picked out some names that sounded like last names, and then I wrote the first names on cards and wrote the last names on a piece of paper and matched them up to see how well they went together. It was a hard choice: I have to choose between Sidonie Fairbanks, Carissa Charles, & Carys Lansing.

I myself am leaning towards Sidonie Fairbanks, and am 80% sure I'm going to use that. It's French for appealing, and Fairbanks is the surname of one of my favorite silent movie era actors.

One of the main factors that went into this change is branding. As I was looking through my latest issue of the Rhapsody Book Club, I noticed that a few covers had the author's surname printed larger than their first name. And I realized that it was branding the author's name. There are plenty of people(author's that is), whose first names could be Julia, but when you see the name "Quinn", you know who it is. The same with "Quick", "Lowell", "Medeiros", "Coulter",etc. And I realized that I also didn't want to ride on another author's coattails by having a similar or same surname as them. I want my own brand name. And I like Fairbanks. It sounds aristocratic, yet soft on your tongue.

Tuesday, July 27, 2004

I think my CP, Dailey, is lying her butt off.

So, yesterday, I wrote a new Brava exerpt, a historical set in the Regency era that I didn't want to write, but I ended up doing it anyways.(my brain argued with itself over it one side was like "write it!", the other side was like "don't write it!", "yes!", "no!","yes!","no!"...as you can tell, my brain is a little skitzo.). But anyways, so I wrote it, and sent it to Dailey.

I get on today, and she is in alt over it! I've never seen her this excited over something I wrote before(hmm...is that a bad thing?lol), and I do not believe her excitement. Immediately after I sent it to her, I was like "It sucks, it realy sucks, I know it does, it sucks!", so now I'm in a state of disbelief. Of course it needs editing because it was a 1 1/2th draft(haha, is there such thing?), but I don't believe it's that compelling. I think I need a second opinion...

I'm pissed off at Blogger. I post my entries, and I don't see them until like, a day after I posted them! I have yet to even see the post I made earlier yesterday(Mon, that is). If they don't fix this, I'm going to get irate. It's probably a combination of having 70+ posts, Blogger acquiring a foreign blogger company therefore having to add more people to their database, as well as having a whole bunch of other users. But I'm not going to use something else, I've been with Blogger since 2000.

But anyways, a few hours ago, I wrote the first chapter of the first book in my Francesca Witherspoon series. It got tha ya-ya's Sookie Stackhouse stuck on me out--somewhat. And I like the first chapter. Of course, I have to get used to writing in first person again(haven't done that since I thought I was going to single-handedly bring the gothic romance back to life!), as well as being less formal with the style. Cuz see, third person POV is rather formal compared to first person POV, because it's someones thoughts and impressions from the bat, and most people don't think formally in their head. Unless they're weird.

So, I think I shall write a chapter a day on that book for this week, and then in August, I'll get my first book, I'm just calling it "Wicked"-a little dumb, a little predictable, but I can't find a suitable title for a late Victorian set romance with a trying-to-reform rake and an uptight debutante set mainly in an orphanage/home. But the thread of the story is tinily taken from "The Taming of the Shrew", but not really, so that title is irrelevant. Did that all make sense?

My mouth is zipped tight from talking about Sookie Stackhouse again. I Sookie-d myself out spreading the word. But don't you do that when you read a spectacular book? I know I do.

Dido's cd, "Life for Rent", is so relaxing. I've been listening to it every day for the past couple days and I can't not listen to it. Everytime I try to put something else in there(like Evanescence or Alicia Keys), as soon as the cd is over, I have to pop Dido's back in there. I tend to do that alot with cd's, and because of it, I can pop a cd into the player and the entire cd can take me back to a time in my life. Like, Christina Aguilera's debut cd takes me back to when I was obsessed with Buffy/Spike fanfiction and was on the computer all the time reading it, talking about it, writing it, and running a site about it. But hey, the site is still up. Visit it here. I haven't updated it in a long time because all the files are on a computer that doesn't have internet access. I do miss running my fansites. Perhaps I'll put them back up when I get a good computer.

So, I procrastinated with writing Lucas'(the hero of "Wicked") "hero's journey" in order to delete and read all of my email, as well as get in the mood to even write the new Brava exerpt and the FW chapter. I think that now that I've cleared mostly everything up, my writing mood will be back on track. And oh yeah! Teresa Medeiros' new book is out today! Even though I did see it in Wal-Mart on sunday(those gun jumpers), and I'm debating whether to get it.

See, I think I have 19 dollars in my checking account, and I still haven't gotten Pamela Britton's "Scandal" yet--I have to support her, she is so damn nice.So that's like...5.99+5.97+tax. And CA tax is so wacky, it'll probably clear my friggin bank account out. Thank the Lord above in the heavens that my library got all of these May 2004 releases in their catalogue! I put requests on Gaelen Foley's book, Connie Brockway's, Christina Dodd's and a few others. Oh, and I also saw Leslie LaFoy's book in Wal-Mart. I think I may have to take a little stroll over there and read a couple books.

But I hate not having a car or knowing how to drive. Riding public transportation in Sacramento is so complicated. And I hate the fact that it's so public. Gah! I've met some interesting characters on the bus, and have been hit on by 99.999999% of them! I'm like, how am I gonna date someone that rides the bus too? What are we gonna be like? "Oh, I'll take this bus and you take the other one, and we'll meet at this stop and take the train here." lmao. That is so lame. I'm sticking to guys with cars, but it's hard to find quality in a town with a very high divorce rate, not to mention people obsessed with one night stands! I think Sacramento is the inspiration for the Harlequin secret baby books, I swear.

Monday, July 26, 2004

It appears that my email rant caused a few people problems. I'm deleting it. Not because I regret what I wrote, but because I am considering the aforementioned people's feelings. But 1) this is my own personal blog. 2) I am allowed to write whatever I want because it is mine 3) I don't disrespect others. If I have a problem with someone or something, I will go to them and politely state my difference with them. Perhaps I should put a disclaimer on here? *g* But anyways; onward young cowboy, onward!

But some good news! I won an ARC of a Katie MacAlister book. Yay me! I love winning things regardless of what it is. And also, I spent all day yesterday using Christopher Vogler's book to plot my novel. That book is amazing! It has helped clear of plotting clouds and character clouds. The only thing I'm still working on, is the ending, but I'm hoping that an unknown ending is a good thing.

I'm going to pacing myself extensively. I have to calm myself down whenever I think about writing this first draft for a month and then seeing that it's nearly September and the year is nearly over. But I know that time is irrelevant to a good story. I'm not going to rush this book out and send it, only to get rejected when I could have taken lots of time to make it as wonderful as my mind has it. The main thing is gaining an agent. The subsequent books with this series will come after I get the book deal. And I'm hoping that I gain representation by the end of this year(a publishing deal is also squeezed in), and I'm gunning for being able to have two books come out in my first year, whether it be 2005 or 2006.

ALSO, three more books sprung forth from the original trilogy and it is so exciting.

I'm also free-writing this Brava targeted romantica exerpt-for Lori Foster's contest-that is hilarious and uber-sexy. I just hope that I can find someone to crit it, because my newly joined crit groups download their subs to a folder online and my stupid, stooopid computer won't allow me to do it. I really prefer being able to send the subs through email.

I'm also working on "branding" myself. As in, finding a logo that will allow people to know that something is by me, and something that will be associated with me. And I found it! Fans. I adore fans and I will be gunning for all of my covers to have it on them.

Reading-wise. Charlaine Harris' Sookie Stackhouse series has put me into a reading slump! I adore Sookie & Co, and after reading "Dead to the World", I just could not, could not get into anything else. I picked up Lisa Kleypas' "Suddenly You", I was not feeling it. I picked up a Dark-Hunter novel, it made me laugh it was so corny and confusing, and then I picked up a Jane Feather book, hoping that she would pull me out. But no, she didn't. And I've re-read DttW five times already, and then re-read Dead in Dixie again! I can't get enough of Sookie! Maybe Anita Blake is as good as it? I'm going to check it out.

Thursday, July 22, 2004

Doubt is sitting on one shoulder, and impatience on the other.

Two lethal weapons of mass destruction for an author. I think those are even worse than having "writer's block". But then again, writer's block most likely stems from those two demons.

But I did figure out what is missing from this story: the prigishness and hauteur of the heroine, Noelia. I kept making her this unsatisfied person, when in fact, she was quite satisfied with the way her life was going, up until the hero, Lucas showed up. I changed her too fast in under 100 pages, and the story was going wonky. No wonder I kept feeling that the scenes I was writing belonged in different parts of the story. And so, back to the drawing board I go.

Not that there's alot to draw on that board, I just have to reconfigure everything and fit it together. And correct my pacing. The pacing keeps fleeing from me and making the book faster than it should. I read Karen Ranney's latest yesterday, and just finished Susan Wiggs The Hostage, and the pacing was stupendous. Of course, I have no idea what the first drafts looked like, but I'm sure they have their stories pacing down by now.

But I have to pull myself out of the mode I was in during the first half of this year: of playing "catch-up". Because I started writing late last year, I felt behind everyone, and so I pushed, and pushed, and pushed myself to gain on everyone's tales. It was good in that I was able to set goals and meet them, as well as increasing my writing skills at a phenomenal rate, but now that I have the time to relax, and allow the story to bloom at it's own pace, I keep getting impatient, and then the doubt sneaks in the back door because the story isn't unfurling its petals the way it had before. Now, bear in mind, my earlier stories shall never see the light of day, but I was still able to write stuff. But then, that is my point: what came out quickly wasn't that great.

I can write a book in two weeks, if I write 10,000 words a day, five days a week. But why should I, when I have plenty of time to develop and nurture this story. And I can't give it up because I know it is a marvelous story, and that the two connecting stories are stupendous. I just need to take a deep breath and relax.

And so, tommorrow, or should I say today, I am going to be a busy bee, reorganizing everything and moving the already written scenes around to fit within the context of the story much better. But I'm not going to get uber-technical with it. Because technical-ness ruins my creativity. And oh yeah, that whole thing about "knowing the rules to be able to break them" is so true. Now that I know the rules, I know what can be broken and how, and it makes my writing alot smoother.

Wednesday, July 21, 2004

Don't you hate that you hit a stride in your writing just when you need to go to bed?

That happened to me today. The first day of writing is always easy and smooth for me, but the subsequent days are a struggle. Especially those days when I can't hit that rhythm I had the day before, and I end up writing at least half of what I wrote the previous day.

I don't think I'll give up writing this MS from scratch because it is so liberating. And everytime my mind tells me that some historical detail may be wrong, or it makes me hesitate because I don't feel "grounded" enough in the period, I shut it up because when I go back and revise everything, then I can add the period touches and lush writing that I like to do. I have to keep in my mind that the first draft is the naked draft; each revision is like laying on an article of clothing.

But I purchased Karen Ranney's So In Love because even though I've never read a book by her, she seems so "real", and what I have read from her is lush, lyrical and emotional without the whining or self-pity that fills books that try to pass themselves off as "tortured heros/heroines" or "emotional journeys". This is the real thing, and I am taking notes.

I'm also curbing my impatience. An agent who represents some really big names is keen on reading a submission. Formerly, I would probably think to write the first three chapters, get them critted and then send them off. But I want to take my time with this MS. It won't do to try and rush things and mess up-especially with the prices of postage these days. So I am going to pour myself into this MS and make it the best alone draft I can before I send it to be critted by others. And then after that, it will be polished to my standard of perfection and sent off.

I was talking with my CP Dailey, and I asked her whether she felt the stress would disappear once an agent was acquired. Of course she agreed with me on "yes". It's true though. Once you acquire an agent, you can devote more time to your craft and writing instead of when you're unpublished and you're constantly in a scramble to write something that could possibly be agent-acceptable, and spend the interim between recieving a rejection or acceptance letter on pins and needles. Not that acquiring and agent, as well as finding a publisher will make all of your worries go away, but it releaves the unpublished author anxiety quite a bit. Unless you get an agent that doesn't mesh with you at all. But that is a whole 'nother ballgame.

Alison Kent said that she agreed with Mrs. Giggles latest rant. And I do too. If the women's fiction and chick-lit(in all of its incarnations), books in the vein of Bombshell,etc are leaping by bounds in the market, how come the traditional romance market isn't following? Why aren't there any new elements being added to the market? Not to say that there aren't gems out there, there are alot of them, but I'm referring to the new blood and near-new blood, and maybe authors who hit their peak a long time ago and are at a plateau or on a decline. Or even unpublished authors whose books keep getting turned down because they don't fit within the confines of the marketing department? Yes, there are e-pubs. But ignoring the quality debate, you aren't going to be able to support yourself the way you possibly could with a NY publisher.

Monday, July 19, 2004

I scored big time at the book sale.

Among various historical romances by Roberta Gellis and Jennifer Blake, I got the first three Sookie Stackhouse books in one hardcover volume! I read all three over the weekend and want more! They series is low-rent Buffy, but in a good and sexy way. But poor Sookie, she gets the crap beat out of her in all three books and I wonder how the hell the girl survives in the subsequent books. But her vampires and Were's and shifters are sexy. But the name Bill. It kills me. I know it's supposed to be funny, but between the sideburns and his name, I had a hard time bringing up a picture of him in my mind as I was reading. Even though his character is sexy, everytime I saw his name, I had to push away to image of a pudgy, middle aged white man in horn-rimmed glasses and try and superimpose it with the guy on the cover at least. But I kept failing.

But I am in awe of Charlaine Harris with the third book. I am in awe because she managed to make me happy about a twist in Bill and Sookie's relationship, and the end paragraph still cracks me up. I really do need to start working on my own series!

I aslo finished reading the cheesiest romance I've ever read: Enslaved by Virginia Henley. GOOOOOD grief that book was cheesy and corny. It was supposed to be some hybrid of time-travel, historical and metaphysical romance, but it was so stupid. Diana, the heroine didn't even go back in time until chapter seven, and that was after VH introduced all of the characters and had Diana do the stupidest things ever. The hero, Marcus, bid on Diana in the "present" time(18th C England), and then, his ancestor became the hero when Diana went back into time. Then, after Diana died in the past time, she came back to the present time and was babbling about her experiences, and she and the present day Marcus got together. But what killed me was the skanky homo-villain sex in the "past". I couldn't believe she put that in there. I'm still bemused. But yeah, that book is uber-cheese. I could put it in a microwave and pour it over my macaroni.

Anyways, on the writing front, I'm reading Bird by Bird, by Anne Lamott. Teresa Medeiros recommended it and I am ever so grateful. It has the right amount of snarkiness and humor that I like and Lamott strips down the pretensions that writers and wanna-be's sometimes have about the business and craft.

I also was able to sketch out the late-Victorian trilogy and I am excited to start it. The first book is set in London, the second in Egypt, and the third one is set in New York. But the third one, I finally finished late last evening. At first, I had the hero, a prig, flee to France, but it wasn't dramatic enough for me, so I moved it to America. And the hunt for his heroine was on. My first thought was to make it a Western, but nothing was coming to my mind. Then, I figured out that my prig, Robert, wouldn't be that drastic, and that he'd go some place that was somewhat similar to London for his "adventure". And BAM, a scene materialized in my mind and I had his heroine and the plot. In this book, I finally found use for my con-artist heroine and her crooked family, as well as she's passing for white to swindel people. It's so clever. In fact, the entire trilogy is clever.

I kept fighting for the book to be nearer to the Regency era, and further from the turn of the century--because of my now dissapated time period snobbery--, and guess what influenced my decision? Fashion. Lol. I kept seeing my heroine's in Belle Epoque fashion, and then, it dawned on me that if one of my heroine's was going to be in Egypt and excavating, the wide skirts of the early/mid Victorian era were not practical. Ergo, the time period of my books. I'm happy about them and I'm starting on the first one today, from scratch. No book research or anything, because if I do, I know I will put off writing for at least another week and I need to do this.

I have also changed my Brava entry idea. The historical plot, I'm saving for something else, and I've always wanted to do something contemporary, and what better way to dip my feet into the pool, so to speak, but in a novella? It's a shorter forum, I can test my skills and I won't be forced to stretch something that I'm not to sure of. And there is NO suspense, NO "sex jobs", and NO icky things passed off as kinky. But bondage is nice. LOL.

Saturday, July 17, 2004

Well, this has totally boosted my confidence as well as showed me why I feel as though BLTN needs to be written. Of course, the title of this book is very similar to Victoria Holt's Mistress of Mellyn, as well as the cover looking as though it fits on a vampire romance, but hey, it's a gothic and it's set in Victorian era San Francisco, and I will snap it up.

And speaking of Victorian era. I went to bed early in order to wake up early in order to be first in line at the library Book sale, only, my brain isn't used to shutting itself off at 12 or 1 am, so I woke up at 5 am and my brain started going, going and was gone. And what came out of it, but three delicious connected Victorian-era romances that I feel uber-excited over. The running theme for all three of them is respectability, and how it doesn't need to run one's life.

I just love romances where the hero or heroine is very straitlaced and their significant other opens them up, so to speak. It's always sexy.

But let me tell you something! I kept dreaming about Colin Farrell last night. It's crazy because I don't even likelike the guy. Sure, he's cute and all, but I'm not in alt over him the way some people are. Good grief, I think it's from watching too much Access Hollywood,Extra,Entertainment Tonight and E! <----as you can probably tell, I love celebrity gossip and knowing what's going on in the world of entertainment.

It's 7-something-am right now, and that Library Sale isn't for another two hours. My mom was laughing at me because I'mm excited over buying Books. I can't help it, I love reading. And that's a good thing!

Friday, July 16, 2004

I feel happy today.

Early this morning, I wrote the prologue and then a few hours ago, I finished the first chapter of Beauty Like The Night. And now, I am feeling the urge to write the second chapter.

But I just deleted the second post I wrote about putting this MS on the back burner and starting on another. Both times, after I wrote them and posted them, something happened to boost my confidence in the story, and I had to delete the post because it was completely irrelevent. I'm thinking that it is a sign that this book is meant to be.

But I am also not going to stress myself out over this story the way I have been in the past. By pacing myself for the next two weeks, I feel that this story is going to come out very nicely.

AND! I am also going to work on a few different ideas when I'm not working on that aforementioned story to keep my "muse" fresh, as forcing myself not to throw my entire TLC into this story and not being inspired enough to work on another great story idea.

Yesterday, I visited Pamela Britton's website and am absolutely amazed at the fact that she has books scheduled all the way to 2007!! It's amazing that 2007 is only three years away, and I will be 23, and will hopefully have at least four books under my belt--therfore fufilling my vow to my classmates when I signed their yearbooks before graduation: "save this autograph for when I get famous within five years!". Of course, I signed my real name instead of this pen name, but I'm sure that I'll find some way of getting famous under my given name.

And my mind is cemented on obtaining an agent first. Not only do the publishers seem to be tightening their belts-so to speak-on unagented and unsolicited submissions, but if a person isn't able to grab some face to face time with an editor before sending a submission off, email interaction with one is rather weak in comparison. PLUS, not only does pursuing editors take up tons of time that you could use to write, but if you exhaust your avenues with a MS that an agent accepts, you've shot yourself in the foot. So, I'm going to pursue my targeted agents and let everything roll from there.

And I'm excited about tommorow because I'm going to a library book sale and hope to grab lots of romances as well as research books.

Thursday, July 15, 2004

Yes, I'm back. But this is the last post for the day, I swear!

But does anyone else have plots and characters,etc, but put them on the backburner because the story isn't coming to them?

I may be nearing the breaking point with this story. On one hand, I'm scared that I may be getting too technical with the story, which is why it isn't coming out correctly; but on the other hand, I don't want this to stress me out when I could work on a story that came to me like water through a spigot.

But I don't want to put this story aside because I love the premise: a spin on the classic "gothic" theme of the hero being accused of killing his wife, except with my twist, it's "what if the wife comes back"?

But then, the day before yesterday, before I went to bed, I had a spurt of inspiration and typed out the main antagonists, the conflict(INT & EXT) and the premise. And that idea is a total 180 from the one mentioned above. 1) it's humorous 2) it's set in Victorian England 3)the hero is a reformed rake.

Talk about writing to the formula, you know!! But I didn't come up with it for the forumla, it just came to me. But NOW, I'm wondering whether I should scrap feeling guilty over the possibility of shelving that first story idea and working on the second.

And THEN, it's like...the second book is more marketable to those pesky editor's minds, but I don't want to get stuck writing humorous and light historicals, when I have darker stuff boiling on the back burner.

Doesn't it seem that I spend most of my time talking about writing INSTEAD of writing? Well, I don't, I just spend my time fiddling with plotting and characters and writing shorts or exerpts to keep my skill fresh--I just haven't written on a planned ST length MS since late May/early June.

But here are my main troubles:
1) I don't want to stress myself out
2) I don't want to stress myself out over nothing
3) I don't want to stress myself out over nothing and end up wasting tons of time that I could be writing

And also, the whole time period thing. Start with a traditional setting, gain following, and then hit everyone with the new setting. Or start with new setting and gain following for writing in a different setting.

I think I need to go for a walk; really.

I've been on the quest for the perfect critique group for a while. At this moment, I am a member of FOUR different groups. The first one, is more of a general critique group, with tons of people on it. The second one, I'm a tad disappointed with it because there aren't enough participating people on it, as well as the people I expected to be in the group aren't even in it. With the third and fourth, I just joined them, and I'm just checking them out. The 3rd one is rather informal, and everyone seems to be writing in one genre, and with the 4th one, there seems to be a good mix of people.

But I'm still disatisfied. Why? Because I am looking for a group with veteran authors-unpublished and published as well as a nice mix of beginning, intermediate and advance authors. I don't need a group with tons of people--10 or less is good--and everyone doesn't need to be published, but I want a group that will challenge me, push me higher as well as provide comraderie of some sort. I'm the sort of person that writes every single day for a set number of hours, and I would love to find a group with people just like me, and I haven't found it yet.

If I was a member of RWA, I'm sure this would be alot easier, but I'm not, so everything I do, is online--to be everlasting chagrin! I don't want to start one because it wouldn't have that mixture I wanted, so I'm searching.

But I nearly forgot that the RWA conference is in two weeks or so. I wish I could go--I'm counting on attending 2005's as a published author,hehe--and I hope all that do attend will bring back lots of information for us poor folks that aren't able to attend.

My computer is so slow, I can't go to everyone's blogs and reciprocate for the wonderful comments they put on my blog--unless I want to spend hours sitting before my screen waiting for things to load. So I am going to make it a habit to visit two blogs everyday I post and comment on them. Sounds fair, non?

The e-pub debate is being held on one of my writing loops. But OK, here is my own PERSONAL take on the subject. Feel free to disagree, but don't flame me because I did put my disclaimer above.

E-pubs are a delightful place for people to shop their MS's after it's been rejected by all of the major NY publishers and/or agents. Some writer's of e-pub heartily defend their publisher with unofficial quotes such as "they take things that are outside of the box", "e-pubs give you freedom to write the books of your heart", "sometimes, NY houses overlook the best MS's, but e-pubs will take it", Or the doozy "some e-pub authors have crossed over to print publishers"

Now, those are paraphrased quotes from arguments I've heard on the net. And here's my opinion. Unless you are writing romantica or erotica, you are not going to make tons of money, and those authors that did cross over, wrote ROMANTICA. I have yet to hear of a non-romantica/erotica author crossing over to a NY house. And for the book of your heart, outside-of-the-box,etc stuff: First of all, queries and cover letters and synopsis' boil down to ONE thing: MARKETING.

If you are writing to the best of your ability and beyond, and you market your "out of the box" MS very,very well, you will probably be able to get it pass the editors and marketing directors. So that argument is flaky at best.

The problem I have with e-publishers, is that it condones mediocrity. Say you wrote a 80,000 word Regency Pirate story, revised it, got it critique by your group/partner, wrote all that good stuff like query letter,etc and sent it off to some agents and editors. Everyone says No. Okay, you're down in the dumps and think you can't write. Then you hear about an e-press from a friend or colleague and about how much that pub has done for their career. And you go "I'll send it to them!". They read it, give you a couple revisions and Bam, you're published. But just wait...what if a year or more down the road, your writing is super and excellent, and upon reading that first MS is pure garbage and you don't know how the heck it got published.

E-pubs feed vanity IMO. It's human nature to block out the bad and take that one good as the gospel truth and everyone else can go hang. I'm sorry, but it is, and if you have been writing for years and you have your walls plastered with rejection letters, and each round of rejections don't step up levels (form, form with quick note from rejectee, form with suggestions, form with note to send something else, handwritten letter, handwritten letter saying that they liked your voice,style,etc), then you are not learning anything or growing as a writer. So of course, being accepting by someone feeds your bruised ego, and that is all I think e-pubs do.

I'm not slamming e-pubs, or saying that they need to be shut down, but I am being realistic. When you make the decision to write and be an author, this isn't something that you dabble with from time to time, or brandish your rejection letters as a sign of being a "real author"(If the ratio between rejections and rejected MS's is unproportionate, I don't buy that line of thinking at all), this is art, but most of all, it's a business.

But on a lighter note, I deleted that pity-party from yesterday because as soon as I pressed "publish", I was over that mood. I am happy with how the B&TB plotting is going. Yesterday I had the biggest epiphany as I was reading some of the writing articles I printed from the internet a few months ago. For the past few months, I have been so excited about my goals and my ideas and my characters, that I completely forgot about the CRAFT. I know that it is left-over residue from my high school days, when I was able to BS my way through writing and public speaking assignments. All throughout my school years, I was able to coast through my classes without having any structure to my writing or speaking. My debate class was starting to correct that, but then I moved to another state and my new school didn't have a Debate class. So ever since then, I haven't had to work hard at writing, but with writing novels, there is a structure to a novel that can't be broken until you know the rules, and I glossed over the rules after reading a couple "How-to" books.

Now my MS's didn't suck, far from it, and I can come up with a plot, conflict and main protagonists/antagonists like that. But pulling it all together to make it a readable and credible story without going off into unknown tangents was killing me. And I am so happy for my epiphany because it felt as though a weight was lifted from my brain and my heart and I feel more confident in my work and myself.

I know everyone has probably heard about the shake-up with Harlequin. Isn't it dramatic? Because if Harlequin is shaking-up, what is the future of romance? Of course, most of the other non-catagory houses were shook up with all the mergers four or five years ago, but Harlequin was the backbone of the romance industry. Not that it impacts me at all--I was never going to submit to HH--but it affects other aspiring authors. I think that the shake-up is Harlequin's fault though, if they were doing their jobs correctly, they would know how to fuse their older audience with their younger audience(and I hesitate to say Blaze is young and hip, because most of the authors are over 30(I'm not saying that's old, just older than the target audience), because the Blaze's I have read were a tad bit stodgy). All that secret baby-cowboy-sheik-millionaire--uber-Harlequin-fantasy world was annoying me to no ends, and I don't even read them!

Brenda Hiatt posted her Show Me the Money article, and apparently, cick-lit authors get very high advances. That sounds great to me because I have some chick-lit ideas floating around in my mind. But it is interesting to see the money listed for Avon as compared to Bantam. Is it because Avon has so many authors bringing money in, that they can put money out? Or are those figures non-representative of what is truly going on--because who knows who volunteered their salary-JQ and other NYT bestsellers could be the ones to have done it--but it's interesting.

Wednesday, July 14, 2004

I don't know why I keep sending e-queries out to this one publisher. Wait, yes I do. It's because I can send it through email at no cost to me that I do it, as well as the hopes of "what if".

Now, I sent off a query in April and the editor emailed me back saying that she didn't like the heroine being an actress because in Regency times, actresses were prostitutes. I do admit that after looking at what I sent off, the wording could have been strong and more "blurby", but that rationalization for rejecting it baffled me! I don't know how many frickin Regencies(trads as well) that have featured faux-courtesan or actress heroines! Obviously, that editor is not up on the ball game.

This one that I just recieved today was a doozy. Once again, I am impetuous and the query I sent wasn't blurby enough and lacked impact, but whatever, I just send them because I can--not that I don't take my career seriously, but sometimes, I like taking chances with things. But here's what the editor said in response:

"Thank you for the opportunity to consider BEAUTY LIKE THE NIGHT. Regretfully, however, I do not feel your proposed story idea is strong enough for ------'s list. A historical romance set in France is a tough sell these days, and I'm afraid that having an amnesiac heroine is too cliché. You may also wish to reconsider your hero and make him less tragic and more sexy."

Now, I know the way I proposed my story was weak, but come ON! The last I looked, fiction was about the STORY, not on the time setting! I know that Regency historicals are the thing, but most people buy historical romances because they are set in historical settings. Yes, some people have time period snobbery, but ultimately, the story sells the book. And the amnesiac heroine? A cliché? The last time I checked, I have only seen ONE amnesiac heroine in their back list within the last 4-5 years or so. And the editor wanting the hero to be less tragic really shows how much the editors at that publishing house only like looking at fun,bubbly,non-issued characters!

And OMG, one of that editor's author's had a tragic hero in her latest release, so what is that editor talking about? But because of that, I am fed up with that house. I probably would send a snail mail query but not tell them about the time period just to see what happens, but at this moment, I am NOT actively pursuing them as a suitable house for me. It is apparent that they only wish to acquire authors who write books exactly like the books they already have and I am not going to sink my career by being a clone.

But what is this trend for frothy books? I'm not some angst-ridden person or an angsty writer, but I like books that have meat on them most of the time and hardly anyone is delivering! Even some of the authors that had darker tones to their books are lighting up or even switching to a different genre of romance to write light and frothy. Does our/their buying habits reflect what is going on in the world? Do readers want fun books because of the social situation(9/11...Iraq..Al-Quaida,etc)? It's not that I want these emotionally exhausting reads, but I like internal and external conflicts set against sensual & rich historical backgrounds. Marsha Canham is retiring for the moment, Teresa Medeiros isn't writing dark because her mother is ill, Judith Ivory has lightened a bit from her earlier books and then she puts out books sporadically, Betina Krahn has lightened up so much from her earlier releases that it's as though I'm reading books by a different author, the wonderful Iris Johansen doesn't even do historicals anymore, and so on and so on.

As an author aspiring to be published by a major published house, I'm nibbling on my nails a bit. I can do fun stuff because I'm a fun person, but I don't want the situation to become too focused on fun books where characterization suffers drastically--which has been the case with alot of books put out by newer authors. I know it's a money thing with authors as well as publishers, but if this becomes a big money making machine, will the heart go out of romance?

Tuesday, July 13, 2004

Thanks to the generous and wonderful Kelly, I have delved deeper and deeper beyond the surface of my characters and their internal and external conflict. Why the heck wasn't I doing this a long time ago!!? Oh yeah, I was being a writing bum.

There should be some sort of penalty for being a writing bum. I can write a story, I can. Make a h/h, make a plot, a general conflict and a bunch of scenes and voila, there's my story. I have two or three completed MS's on my hard drive just like that, and I figured out why I didn't like them after I was finished: they lacked real "substance". If I had polished them up and had them critiqued,etc, I could have sent them out to agents or editors, but then I probably would have either a) recieved a pile of rejections or b) gotten accepted, but my first book would be horrendous. And I don't want to do that to my future readers OR myself.

So now this week is going to be used for this in depth plotting(off schedule darn it) and then the last two weeks of July will be the first draft. Ten days is how I used to write before I took that break, so I know I can do it, but I had counted on the extra week's time to pace myself. Oh well. But the reason why I don't want to extend the first draft into August is because my mind will probably go haywire because it is on this infernal "clock" all of the time, and each day always counts!

I also figured out that I had so many elements as part of the plot, that they were making it hard for me to figure out where to begin. But now, all of that is straightened out and I'm satisfied.

On the AAR list, they've been talking about buying habits and after reading posts where people expressed their dissatisfaction with their purchases, it caused me to wonder what everyone is dissatisfied with? As a writer, this is important to me in case the atmosphere of 2005 and beyond is that buyers stay away from new authors without any buzz or good reviews.

Is it because the quality of new authors aren't living up to expectations?

Veteran authors not putting out the quality they used to produce?

Too much of the same thing out there(regencies,NavySeals,romantic suspense,etc)?

Or is it all of the above?

I tend to buy books sporadically based on either buzz, interesting plot lines, or trusted author. As well as the fact that I only started reading "romances" two-three years ago, so I haven't been able to see the trends in terms of a year by year basis like alot of other people. So what's up?

Monday, July 12, 2004

Does anyone else feel guilty when they don't write when they are supposed to?

Because I do, and no matter how much I rationalize my reasons, I still feel bad for not sticking to my schedule. I started to write my MS on saturday. Woke up on sunday and hated everything I wrote. Erased most of it, and wrote it again. Went to bed hating everything I wrote on sunday. Fell asleep with new revisions on the story and then woke up feeling crazed because the new beginning, changed the entire story around-elements,pacing,characters,etc. So now, I have to re-plot and re-brainstorm everything.

I'm not stressed out, just feeling harried and wondering when does it end! Amanda gave me a link to the Snowflake plotting method and I recieved Beverly Brandt's plotting template in the mail today, so when the delightful Kelly Mcclymer returns, she is going to brainstorm with me. I think someone should start some sort of brainstorming loop or something, because doing it on your own is frustrating sometimes.

But I've reconsidered entering the Great Agent Hunt. I found an agent, Kristen Nelson--who also represents Paula Reed--as well as a few others. I don't really want to be with one of the "big" agents because on one hand, even though they have tons of experience and work with some of the best, their view with new submissions is colored by the fact that they do work with the best, so they will read a submission unconciously, automatically expecting your work to be top-top NYT bestseller writing. And hey, I could do that, I know I could--if I re-wrote every word fifty million times. But a smaller, yet reputable person will have the time to nurture you and help you grow even further in your career.

I added Amanda's blog as well as Ellen Fisher's to the sidebar. I love blogs, I am such a nosy person that I have to know what everyone is doing.

Saturday, July 10, 2004

I'm in a frickin Catch 22 situation!!

Over the past three-four months, I have been trying to find a plotting technique that works for me. 1) Jane Austen style plotting that I took from Julie Beard's Idiot's Guide book: I used this technique, which is good for the major turning points in the book(hey, I finally figured out what the hell a turning point is, I think) and sat down in April and wrote a MS. That went straight to hell. As soon as I reached the last 30,000 words or so of a 100,000 word WIP, everything fell apart! And then I had to scrap large parts of the book and by then, I was through with that WIP.

Then, I found Lisa Gardner's 3x5 plotting technique on her website and have been trying that out. But then Alison Kent posted about her plotting techniques and put a link to Beverly Brandt's plotting technique and now I am in a state of mutiny!!

When I first started writing, I checked out all of the "how-to" books and all that jazz, but as I started to write, I found that those books hindered instead of helped me because whenever I started to read them, I wondered whether I was doing everything wrong. And so when I get to technical with my writing, I can't do it. I sat down yesterday and typed out 1,000 words for the Brava contest with no character sheets and just the names and sketchy background and current occupation of the main protagonists and it just flowed out.

But here's the Catch 22. If I don't have guides to write, I will ramble and will go off track and the characters will end up in a smoky speakeasy in the 30's and the book is set in 1780--because my mind works like Six Degrees of Separation(one thing will trigger off something that will then trigger off something else...I am really good at that game, but it isn't good for writing). So if I don't have things written down and/or plotting cards, the book won't get written. But my mind is so mutinous when it thinks about actual "techniques".

I am still trying to figure out HOW to combat this because I am still in the midst of plotting that damn book that I have been plotting for TWO WEEKS! and I feel stifled by it, therefore, I procrastinate. And procrastination is bad because I am scheduled to start writing on monday. But the main thing that is hindering me is the fact that I have cards with scenes on it, but I'm wondering how the real product will come out. I know, I know, I know!! Write it already! And I have a critique group...HA, I just joined another one, but I am such a fretter and I drive myself crazy.

But what kills me is the whole..."why do they fall in love?" thing. Gah! I need to block these things from my mind and let it come out how it comes out and be damned.

On a lighter note though, I was entranced by Laura Lee Guhrke's "To Dream Again". My previous experiences with LLG(The Charade & Guilty Pleasures) were not good. I'd give the books solid B's, but they didn't have the heart that I felt behind TDA. I kept telling myself one more chapter and I'll go to bed, but TDA was so engrossing, I had to read it to the end. Now that is the sort of book I want to write(I won't start again...lol), and it has reversed my wary opinion of LLG and makes me want to go down the street and get that copy of "Breathless" that I put back.

Alison Kent posted about her disatisfaction with the RWA in her blog today. Even though I'm not a member and would join just because everyone else is, I do have to say that I'm not impressed with anything that has to do with them. Not only is the price steep for sources I can obtain on my own or through my writing loops, but my local chapter is Snoozeville compared to alot of the other chapters and I wouldn't shell out 30-40 dollars for my chapter when it won't do anything for me(can you get a tax write off though?). The only thing I see benefiting me with joining the RWA is reduced fees for the annual conference. The RITA is good if you need something to put on your book cover if you haven't hit one of the best selling lists, but it seems as though the same people either win or are finalists every year. I'm not saying that a person like Nora Roberts doesn't deserve it, but she has so many awards and accolades, does she really need something as paltry as the RITA award? The woman made 60 frickin million dollars last year and has #1 NYT bestseller on her books instead of just plain NYT Bestseller like everyone else.

And what exactly is the duty of the RWA? Writing contests, networking and retreats/conferences aside? Do they do publicity for authors? If you know everything about your own editor/agent/publisher, what else can they do for you? Personally, I think they were great for that period when the internet and those writer's market books didn't exist, but right now, I think they are really for beginner writers and maybe,just maybe published authors who are above the radar. But all of us in between(intermediate-advanced unpubbed authors and pubbed authors below the radar), we fall through the wayside with them.

Thursday, July 08, 2004

My plate is full right now.

I'm going to be putting the finishing touches in plotting this novel tentatively titled "Beauty Like The Night", while sketching character pages for the exerpt of the story I'm going to be submitting to the Brava contest, as well as two other plots that are loosely connected to the first novel. Everything is set in the 18th century, so the only extra research I'll have to do is the geographical and customs type things--New Orelans, London, Naples,etc. And a chick-lit idea I had festering in my mind.

I discovered why I had such an apathetic attitude towards chick-lit/contemporary romances: #1: I read some bad Harlequins and #2: none of the protagonists act like any 20 something person I know. And as I spend more and more time at different authors websites, I realize that these women are approaching 20 something women and men from their own perspective. Yes, they probably get input from their children or friend's children,etc, but when writing, you mainly draw from your own experiences. And while people are still people regardless of what century, decade, millinium it is, being 20 something in 2004 is vastly different from being 20 something in the 80's, 70's, etc.

I find myself laughing in disbelief when I read about 20-something year old virgins who aren't Christian or Mormon or any other religion/belief where physical chastity is part of the basis of their beliefs. I mean, even if you've never had sex, you at least can understand things and jokes,etc, but the women in the romances are complete innocents! It's impossible unless you grew up in a backwards, isolated community--which these women certainly are not because the books are in cities and towns. But it's crazy. I think the romance genre is a tiny bit stifling because the hero and heroine are supposed to end up with each other and only be with each other throughout the course of the book. So when I read about an inexperienced, virgin, innocent heroine finding true love and happiness with the hero--the only man she's ever dated or been with, it makes me wonder what sort of planet the book was set on.

I'm not trying to say that my generation has low morals and everyone must be experienced and cynical in the ways of love, but those types of plots/characters are really, really out there in terms of reality. Even though at first, I didn't read chick-lit because alot of them were about ultr-rich,spoiled socialites or young women not making alot yet spending tons on shoes, I can believe those books as a reflection of 20 something-early 30 something than straight contemporary romances.

And erotic romances. Mrs. Giggles waxed eloquently on that subject nicely. I've read some Blazes and some historical Bravas, and while I fairly liked some of the Blazes that were written by authors who write ST and Susan Johnson's Bravas and regular historicals, with the rest of them, I am left cold. The definition of erotic is: of causing sexual love; esp tending to arouse sexual desire or excitement. To me, that equates passion! In some of them, erotic means having lots of sex and saying curse words while they're having lots of sex.

OMG, that is not erotic. That is just reading about people having lots of sex. The foreplay and exchanges between characters when they aren't having sex is boring and flat, so when they get it on, it leaves one feeling as though they are looking upon something interesting, but not ultimately hot. The sexiest part of a man's body to me is his hands and how he moves them. But the "hot" books I've read don't even dwell on the tiniest details that makes a person physically attracted to someone--even someone's laugh can be erotic. But I guess alot of authors don't get that.

Wednesday, July 07, 2004

I'm skeptical about author endorsements on the front covers now. I just read this review on AAR that gave the book an F, yet the author endorsment on the cover is estatic about the book and calling the author a refreshing new talent. And I have read some wallbangers that had endorsements from my favorite authors.I'm not saying that they should be done away with--I'm sure they influence some consumer's opinon upon buying the book--but is the endorsing author being for real? I mean, I know I would adore to have Teresa Medeiros or Betina Krahn or Marsha Canham endorse my book whenever it comes out, but I do believe that I would want the FULL and TRUTHFUL report of what they truly felt along with the glowing endorsement sentence. Because if we are coddled by reviewers, how would we grow as authors? Which is why I love sites like Mrs. Giggles and AAR. I know it's going to hurt if/when I get a not so great review, but I'll use it as a learning experience and learn not to repeat mistakes that readers felt were weak spots in my book. Of course, I would never allow myself to pass a substandard book from my hands to my editors hands because not only would I be ruining my career from the starting line, but I would be cheating myself as well as my future fans.

And I'm having second thoughts about Kensington. While they are at the bottom of the heap when it comes to quality, Paula Reed's cover and time period show that perhaps K has more lenience than a bigger house. Not to say that Berkley and St Martin's Press aren't my number 1 and 2 priority, I'm just not going to shut Kensington out like I was going to previously. Now Dorchester, I have given up on them from a long time ago--ever since I saw the Katie MacAlister cover that had a woman's neck and a band-aid superimposed over it like they used MS Paint to copy and paste the band-aid. It was horrible. And then, their covers look all fuzzy and dim. *shudder*

But I do know that I am obsessed with all things French now. Something that has come back to me upon discovering that Jennifer Blake was coming out with a new historical trilogy set in New Orleans. I ADORE Jennifer Blake's books(not her contemps though), you can't comprehend how much I love her books. Even though they were written in the 80's, they had none of the more sordid aspects of that era. They are sensual, lush, seductive and out and out dramatic set against the sweet decadence of historical New Orleans society. I am definitely going to set some books there. Without a doubt.

But coming back to Kensington--I do have to get it in there that Paula Reed has a mulatto heroine in her November book(perfection! I loved mixed race characters--NOT "half breeds"--because I can fully identify with them)--I am revising my Brava contest idea because that one was way too tame and this plot has been sticking to my brain for a while. I've always been fascinated with the legal system and court cases(I've always wanted to be able to say "He's Guilty! Guilty! Guilty!" or "You can't handle the truth!" because I am melodramatic that way lol) and I've always wanted to know how historical lawyers worked. The plot is a secret--hopefully you'll be able to read it in the Brava contest, if not, I'll post it somewhere for you to read--because it is so smoking hot I don't know if I'd jinx it if I posted it here. But it's stewing in my brain at this moment.

Tuesday, July 06, 2004

I am going to enter Lori Foster's Brava contest with a variation of the Blaze idea I had--but it's going to be a historical, because I find that I have to work even harder to gain my contemporary voice. It would be nice if I won as well as gaining the Brava contract because then, my foot would be in the door and it would open the door for other publishing houses. And I do think that writing romantica historicals would be fun, because most of my plots are very sexy and tend to have heroes and heroines that aren't of the norm. Plus, romantica has core followers and perhaps I would be able to write in non-traditional settings that a traditional romance imprint wouldn't trust as much coming from an unknown author.

But whoa,whoa,whoa. I had the weirdest coincidence as I was reading a book called "Life in the French Country House"--research for my book--it says that there was a real life Beauty and the Beast couple in 18th century France--Vicomte & Vicomtesse de La Chastre--that lived in a chateau called Monts. Now is that a sign or what? Not only is my plot based off of Beauty and the Beast, it is in 18th C France and the hero is a Vicomte!

I found a new author--Paula Reed at Mrs. Giggles review site. Now, she gave the book a 78 or something--that is at least a high C--but the book is not only a pirate book, but is set in the 17th century, which is enough to make me want to try her out. Now, bear in mind, it is published by Zebra, but the setting is enough to induce me to buy it. And the cover is not too bad either. Is Kensington trying to get rid of their reputation perhaps? And the book is only 3.99. They must be trying hard.

Sunday, July 04, 2004

Is there some sort of frickin rule that says you have to like every single member of your family? Just because you are related by blood to someone all of the sudden you should express love and friendship with them? My mom has recently reconnected with her father's family and while it's cool and all--because my family(mom,me and two brothers) have always been on our own--but I don't feel interested and connected to them the way I was with my mom's sisters when we finally met them for the first time 6 years ago. And since last Thanksgiving, whenever there's a major holiday, they ask us to visit them. I am so bored whenever I go down there. I'm 20 years old and the cousin closest to my age is 26, but she's married and has a kid and then, the last time I went down there, she totally slammed my writing and career asperations and lifestyle--in the nicest way though. All I do down there is sit on a couch and twiddle my thumbs as I try my hardest to pretend that I am enjoying myself.

But when I say I don't want to go, my family acts as though I'm the horriblest person in the world because I don't like being around people. And it is so frustrating because you aren't required to be around people you don't particularly care for, but when they are family, you're expected to love them and be friends. First of all, I'm not one of those huggy-huggy people even with my friends because to me, physical touch is a sign of trust--so, if I touch you, you can probably figure out that I like you. And now, it makes me feel all guilty because if I continue to not go, they'll think I don't like them and/or think I am better than them! That is not the case; it's just that I am not feeling them the way they feel me. Because of my past, and numerous other situations with relatives, family does not make me feel warm fuzzies and eagerness to meet them. The only reason why I took to my mom's sisters is because they didn't pounce on me, expecting me to be the bubbliest person in the world to be meeting them--which is exactly how the aunt that is closest to my age(she's 28) is, so we all got along really well over the years. But these new relatives, they no doubt had a normal, functional upbringing, so they expect everyone to be just like them. It's frustrating as I said before.

But on a lighter note, I am reading this spectacular biography about Aphra Behn, a woman playwright,poet,spy and author during the Restoration era who broke free of the bonds that were placed on women to become successful in the world of the London literary circle. She, and La Maupin are two 17th century women who defied conventions while still struggling to balance their feminine identity. I admire them both greatly and would love to write a book based on either of them.

I added some more blogs to the sidebar, so go check em out.

On friday, I was able to write out characters sheets for each of the known characters in my historical/paranormal series and it turned out excellent. I used a tiny bit of Buffyverse(Joss Whedon's Buffy universe for all of you non Buffy-philes) and then added some of my own interpretations in the mix. My heroine; Francesca Witherspoon is a spinster heiress(she created herself without any help!) with death in her past and has been reluctantly dragged into the world of vampire(and monster) slaying by a mysterious French/Scottish man named Alasdair de la Tour(keeping France in the mix!), who is also a slayer. Cuz see, in my world, there's a male and a female slayer called in each generation. It's set in the early 1800's--pre Regency and post Napoleon(which is why I have this wonderful book about France under Naploeon as well as some memoirs of his court) because I wanted to stay close to the 18th century, but not in crazy hoops. But that's all I have for now, I'm going to focus on my 18th C france story because switching between third and first person would mess me up.

And today, it clicked. My story that is. I have character sheets and mynotecards, but nothing was connecting because I was trying to make my story something it was not: Judy Cuevas dark to the 10th degree. I can't write like that regardless of how much I want to. Even though I have a cynical and distrustful attitude towards people a good amount of the time and "get" people within moments of meeting or talking to them, I am not an exposer of the sordid side of the human spirit. Yeah, I don't want my characters to be perfect and bubbly, but I don't want my book to be a cynical romance because that is depressing sometimes. So, I injected humor and sexiness into the book that it previously lacked. And I am very humorous when I want to be and I find that is what comes out in my writing! I don't know, is cynicism my id and humor my ego? Blech, I won't get into that here, it's way too personal, but I am surprised when a scene comes out more humorous than I had thought it was going to be.

Reading Recommendation: The Golden Tulip by Rosalind Laker.
It's set in 17th century Holland and centered around the lives of three sisters and their gambling,drunken artists father. It may sound like women's fiction on that short liner, but it is one of those epic, 80's romances without the domineering hero and submissive heroine. It is full of history,romance,humor,sensualness and love. Read it!

Friday, July 02, 2004

I have to get this out of my system before I get to other things: I am addicted to Real World,Newlyweds and the Ashlee Simpson show. But my younger brother is probably more; he watches the repeats all the time. And I just found out that RW/RR has a blog, so I'm adding that link as well as the link to the Best Week Ever Blog(my other favorite snarky show) to the links section. And if anyone else has a blog and/or website, feel free to email me for me to add it.

And now back to your regularly scheduled programming:

I am really impressed with the sheer volume of books Katie MacAlister puts out each year. Not only does she write historicals, but her paranormals: the Dragon Huntress and the Moravian series, but her regular contemporaries and her YA novels:which are three series' in itself! I want to be just like that. Perhaps not the volume, but I'd have my historicals, my historical paranormal series and my contemporaries(ST and maybe catagories). I believe that diversity is the key to success in this industry, if you want to survive and get up to the bestseller lists. I do believe that the days of writing only historicals and becoming USA Today and NYT bestselling authors has passed, and in order for us newbies to carve a spot out for ourselves, we'll have to spread our wings. As well as finding you own niche that will be your trademark writing style(or styles if your voice changes with different genre's).

But I am considering starting either a yahoogroups or a YG Newsletter to promote the 18th century to other readers and writers alike, because if publishers see that there is a demand for books that are set PRIOR to the Regency, they will be more amenable to supply it. Of course, I wouldn't run it by myself, I'd probably take France and fashion and other people could take, say, America,Italy,Russia,Scotland and England. And maybe Ireland because no one ever writes in that country either. But I'm trying to find some people that would be interested in helping me with this.

I started a firestorm on one of my writing loops. Historical accuracy.

Now, I didn't mean for it to start, I merely wanted to know why historical innacuracy irritated the heck out of people. But it turned into statements about each person's stance. Now for me, I love history, so I only read historical romances--not to "escape" from the current world, but because I love history. I love researching for my novels because I like learning about different countries and customs. But what turns me off with this long hashed arguement is when the people that enjoy history-lite books, or might not do intense, intense research are treated as though their brains don't function as well as other people who enjoy 99% historical accuracy. The thing that keeps popping up with this is that we demean the romance industry when historical romances aren't accurate. I'm sorry, but regardless of whatever happens within the genre, we will never get the respect we deserve. Romance deals with emotions and sexuality and in a way, we are a cynical and psuedo-repressed society that has been programmed to publicly decry love and softer emotions and to turn your nose up at excessive sexuality as something dirty. No matter how much the RWA campaigns, or readers and authors make snappy comeback's, the romance genre will always make people nervous.

Now, on the historical accuracy in historical romances, I do love history, but that doesn't mean I know everything about all countries. So when I'm reading, say, a medieval set in Scotland, if something is wrong, I don't know unless it has been pointed out to me prior to reading the said book, or if my eye has come across something disputing it before I picked up the book. Not to say that I take everything in historical romances as the gospel truth, but reading them helped me to better understand what the hell I was supposed to be learning in my AP European History class. Because when I would read a romance set in a certain period, I would go to the library and check out a book on that period and because the romance was in an easier context, I was more able to understand something!

We, as the writer's that constantly get online bemoan the authors that get published that don't get their facts straight, but to me, it makes us seem just like people who say the government sucks, but don't even vote! Are we saying these things to the people that matter? Are holding the current bestselling historical authors who write history-lite accountable for what they are doing? Are we even trying to raise awareness in the normal romance buyer who doesn't even think about historical accuracy? No. Now these things have been coming to me as I write them and I feel strong enough to put myself out there, but is anyone else? Is the romance genre so full of kiss-butt's that we are scared to call our authors out on something the way other genre's of fiction do? Is it because we are women and women are used to dissembling? I don't know, but nothing will change until we raise the banner and do something instead of grumbling to ourselves.

Phew, my soapbox is caved in now. I know for a fact that the reason why I feel so strongly about this is because of my african-american ancestors who lifted their voices against injustice. Not that this is something that dire, but things don't change by under the breath mumblings. They change by shouts.

But right now, I do believe that you shouldn't hate the player(the author), hate the game(the publishers that allow historical inaccuracy to slide by). Maybe the reason why historically accurate books aren't being published because the romance historian is either a) not up to publisher standards(don't even argue about that) or b) they were so pretentious with their knowledge that they bored the editor.

And THEN, nearly all books that are being published are Regency-set historicals, and most of them are light and airy in tone and conveys that the history doesn't matter because the Regency period was fun,fun,fun and nothing bad happened except for the wars--but that was on another continent. It is that genre that is killing the historical romance and the accuracy bid. Not counting traditional regencies, I can get a one page list(back and front) that lists books that aren't your typical bluestocking/beautiful debutante meets rake/spy/noble/aristocratic hero meeting and falling in love during the season. The plots don't deviate, so the historical time period becomes a moot point. I do believe that it will rise when authors write in OTHER periods. But if you don't have to think of the setting anymore--because you've been writing in it for so long--except for the clothes and the date you put at the beginning of the novel, it's easy to fall into a history-lite pattern.

Don't flame me, but I think it's laziness on that author's part. You're not going to grow as an author if you don't get out of your comfort zone. A while ago, I asked authors whether they'd write in other time periods, and to read between the lines, I saw a HUGE no. It's that old "if it ain't broke, don't fix it" mentality that is slugging the genre into the grave. An editor's job is cut in half if they see on the cover that "oh, it's a Regency set historical" because they don't have to think about the period or try and get a feel for it because it's been rehashed so many times, it feels like your old ratty houserobe that you loll about the house in on the weekends. That is NOTT a good thing. There is a big difference between comfort entertainment and real entertainment. When you look at all the most loved movies out there, it is the innovative ones that are on the lists, not the movies that rehashed formulas and in a lazy way.

This post has gotten longer than I realized, but I have alot to say and when I get published, I know for a fact that I won't churn out a book a year and sit back on my laurels and not be on point not only with my writing, but with publishers and my fellow authors--unpublished and published. Perhaps alot of people won't like what I've said, but we need to be real, like Mrs. Giggles said, the romance genre is way too nice and false.

Thursday, July 01, 2004

In the words of 50 Cent: "Go shorty, it's ya birthday, we're gonna party like it's ya birthday, we're gonna sip Bacardi like it's ya birthday, and you know that we don't give a f*** if it's ya birthday!"

Yes, at 11:58 pm, I will officially be TWENTY. Yay. Even though I feel sort of old. But I'm 20, and I'll have fun! Now I have to change that side thingy to say "post-teenage", because that is what I am. I don't think you're truly an adult until you either a) have kids or b) get married or c) pay a mortgage or d) all or any of the above.

But today I went to the library and traded all my Louis XIV books for Louis XVI. I did think that I wanted to set this book pre-American Revolution as well as Pre-French Revolution, but I am in the midst of reading a book by Bernier about France,Naples and America from 1770-1790 and it is so fascinating. I also went to the Sacramento Room(hush hush, rare books room in the library) and studied this text that was published in 1870 about the entire 18th century. Man, I wish I had that book because it is so freakin awesome. Perhaps I'll find it somewhere.

Confessions of A Writerholic